The social stigma against COMPLAINS..

     The human race is evolved with an ability to perceive what's going on around in the environment. We have a cognitive ability and that is what makes us realise if there is something wrong going on around us. It helps us to raise our voice and ask for help or even complain to save ourselves from that wrong thing. But when the matter comes to a problem within us or with the people around us, and if this cognitive ability comes into action we are somewhat under an external pressure and resistance to not bring it out in public.

     These are a wide range of topics such as, a mental health issue, an issue with the behaviour of a family friend or a relative, an issue with your own family or parents, an issue with someone socially powerful and sometimes even those who are a part of some authorities, etc.

There might be more in this list or maybe some different versions of the same story. But there is one thing that is common, and that is the resistance one faces when he or she decide to speak up against people falling in any such category mentioned above faces a resistance from most of the people around them. 

     People generally don't like the idea itself. They choose to ignore rather than to complain. There are people in the society and the surroundings who try to stop us from complaining about anything, as well.

They know there might be problems or issues but they don't even realise that what they are going through is something they can overcome. But sadly none of these want to come out of their comfort zone. If you aren't one of these and would like to complain about these, they are bound to stop you and bind you as well. It doesn't matter if you may or may not like it. 

     Raising a voice to complain has always faced a social stigma. This social stigma not only causes an obstruction to one individual but to the entire process of modernization as well. The process of getting out of our comfort zone and to stand against injustice is decelerated by this. 

      But why is this happening?

Yes, a basic understanding says, why would anyone not want progress in life? Why would anyone not want to get over their problems if any? Why would anyone be the one to improve the system?

The answer to this is not a single reason. It's a bit complicated. There are multiple interconnected causes for this to happen.

The very first being that most of us have now become used to the ways of the society. It's just like getting out of your blanket in winters, and no one wants to do that. So basically, it is the comfort zone feeling they have got with the regular habit. You can also choose to take other route to your office if there are people stalking you on the regular way. You can choose to adjust or ignore if your relative is creating too much nuisance these days.

All of these are somewhere due to the reason that you have given yourself a comfort of keeping quiet.

      This also gives rise to another reason which is that many have a second option ready for their rescue. You obviously have other route to your office and that is why you aren't bothered of anyone present or absent on the previous way. If we don't have an option, a plan B, or a substitute, we are bound to take and action with the first option itself.

      Let's talk about the next reason that comes on way. And that is, fear. Honestly this is one of the most important reason that affects the most. Most of the people are scared. They are scared of public exposure, scared of struggles that would come along, scared of being humiliated, scared that they might be in trouble, scared of a few things that are baseless but exist, for example, pressure from their parents who stop them to take action, or a possessive and conscious partner. These kinds of fears stop them to even think of speaking about the issues that are problematic.

      The above reason has again given rise to another reason and that is peer pressure. People pleasers often come across this problem. They feel like not getting into such a situation that might diminish their image and they might not get other favours from the latter which they usually got or had some chances to get some possible benefits in the future.

It's mostly a hypothetical assumption that anyone can be helpful at times. Yes, we know this is possible but that doesn't mean that you need to sacrifice much more for an assumed possibility that may or may NOT come. And if this one person isn't there to help you, there might be someone else, or probably some other idea then. But that one reason should not ruin your present.

      Raising a complain is hardly seen as a good attribute. People who make objections often, are ridiculed as 'cry babies' or 'complain boxes' and are made to think that it's not what is around which is wrong. They are told that the problem lies in their habits. They are taught to compromise to an extent that is unbearable if seen from a neutral point of view. Alongwith all of this, raising a voice and taking a step also involves fear of standing alone. There is a fear of criticism and that the society, our neighborhood or our family would not support us. We might face a boycott socially. This creates a stigma to the word 'complain' as a whole. 

      If there is an issue, it should be addressed. And anyone who doesn't want you to stand against injustice is the one who comes under the categories mentioned above. It's not possible to always neglect every reason they give to you, but sometimes it becomes very important to cross check yourself. Check if things that you compromise is not a compromise of your ethics and principles. Have a look if there is an injustice prevailing, or are you deprived of the happiness or the rights that you deserve. If that is the case, don't let any manipulation stop you. Remember that a golden cage is not as precious as freedom. Complain and get things done the way they are supposed to. Take strict actions if required without thinking if the latter would be thinking good about you or not. The truth of life is that your safety and security can never be dependent on anyone else but you, and especially not for someone who has been a reason for your troubles. Decide and differentiate, your decision might change your life and that of many others to a much happier and better future. The issues that you think are petty might become big in the future. And remember, any place where complains are registered are for this purpose, so you aren't doing any crime or deed of self defamation. Therefore, you have no reason to feel ashamed of doing so. All you are doing is trying to solve the problems of your life. Think about it.